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I am a Christian, wife, a friend, and a mommy! God is good He is faithful and His love endures forever. He has truly blessed us beyond measure.

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Tuesday, December 30, 2008

My adorable husband

My Sweetie posted this on his Myspace Blog - he's going to be such a good Daddy.

Fatherhood, graduation, what’s next?
A lot can happen in two months - and a lot has happened since I last blogged! First thing is, I found out that I'm going to be a dad :) It's a pretty mind-blowing feeling when you find out that you're going to be responsible for the life of another human being. Sometimes I feel so ready for it, other times it's pretty overwhelming, but never in a bad way. Steph and I still won't know whether it will be a boy or girl for at least another month, probably more, but we did get to have an ultrasound a couple weeks ago - that was really amazing :) For now, we're calling the baby "Sprout" ;)
Also, since I last blogged, I FINALLY graduated from UNM with a bachelor's degree in Computer Science. Sometimes it feels like it went by really fast, other times, it really feels like 4 1/2 years... hehe. I probably would feel more accomplished than I do if I weren't going straight to grad school, but it still feels great to have the longest stretch of school done. Just two more years, and I'll be officially done with school. Seems so far off... My kid will be walking and probably talking by then - weird!
Kinda funny how when you have kids, your perspective on life changes. You start to think about every major event in your life by what milestones your child will reach at those times. And you really start thinking about how what you do, say, and live every day will affect their life. It's pretty awesome, and I feel totally blessed that God would entrust me with someone else's life. Words just don't do it justice - that's just the best I can do to describe how I feel about it ;)
Well... I'm outta here... I've still got a lot of sleep to catch up on from the semester!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

9 weeks 5 days

Well we got through the crazy graduation weekend. It was lots of fun but I'm glad I can rest for a while now. I will post some pictures later I have to get them off my camera still. The nice thing about not having Christmas at my house is I dont' have to clean it or get all this food ready. It is a nice thing. Luckily I felt pretty good all weekend so that's good. I'm thinking the placenta is slowly starting to take over cause I have been feeling better. I just can't wait till my next appointment when I hopefully get to see little Sprout again and see how much he/she has grown! Just 2 more weeks!

We got to tell the rest of my family on Sunday and that was a blast! I bought these cute reindeer booties and a teething ring and wrapped them up for my grandparents to open in front of everyone. It was a hit. Everyone was so excited!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

First ultrasound

Hi everyone. The first ultrasound went great! I was so worried but God really worked it out. Everyone is was so nice and the nurse is even the mom of a girl I grew up with! We got to see little sprout's heartbeat and hands and toes. It's heart rate is good 171 bpm. I also got some pics to show you! I know it's hard to see but he/she is facing us and that's his/her little hand on the left waving at us! God is sooo Good! DH was amazed and in awe like I was. He won't get to go to the next appt but my mom will. I also got the name of a pro-life midwife so I switched my appt to her. I'm excited. It's Jan 6th. Can't wait to see Sprout again! I'll be almost 12 weeks!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

The cross holds it all together...literally

God is truly amazing me today. He always knows how to speak to each one of our doubts. A friend told me about this video and it is amazing. Why am I surprised that God planned things this way?



Psalm 33:6-15
By the word of the LORD were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth. He gathers the waters of the sea into jars; he puts the deep into storehouses. Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the people of the world revere him. For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm. The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations. Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord, the people he chose for his inheritance. From heaven the LORD looks down and sees all mankind; from his dwelling place he watches all who live on earth--he who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do.

Colossians 1:15-20
He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Sad news

Today I found out one of my friends lost her baby at about 12 weeks. This is a very sad time for her and her family. Please keep them in your prayers. I found out CareNet pregnancy center gives free ultrasounds for people who don't have insurance. I made an appointment for next Tuesday. Be praying that we see little Sprout's heart beat and if not that I'll be okay.

8 Weeks

Well we are at 8 weeks already. Time has really gone by. It seems like from day to day it goes slow but then I look back and 2 weeks have past. I think it helps to just focus on today and not worry about tomorrow and look to the future too much. Though it still seems like forever till I'll have any baby bump pictures to post... At least I have all the holiday's to look forward too and DH's graduation. That will help the time to go by faster. Jan 2nd is the big date for my first appt. The one where we really confirm this baby thing. I don't think I will ever think this is real until I get to hear a heart beat or see a baby. I know that's so bad because I have faith that Jesus is real and that God is there without seeing it. I don't know why it's so hard to believe in this. Maybe if I were puking my guts out (which I'm glad I'm not) I might think differently? Who knows. I just know I'm still scared to tell the rest of my family until I see something. Even now so many more people know than I would have originally liked but oh well. As is life. I know if we don't get to keep this one I'm definitely not tell ANYONE till the second Tri. I am thankful I'm not bleeding or really having any cramps to really freak me out since there's nothing I can do; I have any Dr. to go to. I am thankful. God just help me get through these next 3 weeks and let my insurance card get here so I can go to my appt on the 2nd.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Slacker

I know...I'm a terrible slacker. I haven't updated my blog in a week! Anyhow...things are still moving right along as far as I know. I made my first appt. for the OB last week...it's not till Jan 2nd cause of insurance. Being the neurotic mommy to be that I am I made a "backup" appt. with another group just in case my insurance card doesn't come in the mail in time. I'm praying it does but you never know how these things go. But it's a relief cause I would hate to have to cancel my appt and have to wait weeks for another appt. I just wish the "family practice" I go to really was one and did OB too...you just can't find a personal Dr.'s office like them. Oh well. It's just till the baby's here then he/she will be going to the nice competent office :) Can you see the pregnancy rage coming through?...

As far as symptoms go, I was more sick over the weekend but still managed to decorate the house and put the tree up. I'm better today...feel almost like normal. It's so weird how it changes from day to day! I have officially decided to stop temping because I was getting freaked out over my temps dropping when there isn't a need to. It just gives me another thing to worry about and put doubt in my mind if I really am pregnant. I figure it has now been almost 2 months since my period so something must be up right? It's silly I know, but having never gone through this before I want to second guess myself. I can see myself going to the OB in Jan and they say...nope there's no baby in there...what were you thinking? I know...I can't let those ugly little thoughts into my head...I think I read that irrational thoughts were part of this pregnancy thing? God just keeps saying, "Trust me, trust me." Why is trusting so dang hard? Thank goodness for an understanding God and a great supportive husband who always reassures me that everything will be okay. I still try not to think what it will be like to have a baby (for fear of getting to excited) and just focus on things in this week/month of pregnancy.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Our NOT TTC story

Well since Ben and I ever discussed the possibility of marriage we knew we wanted to have kids. I always said I'd like at least 3 (coming from a small family of 2) and he wanted no more than 2 (coming from a family of 5). I figured we'd decide when we got there. We had also planned to not start having kids until Ben was done with school. So as most couple's do we figured I'd get on the pill and we'd be fine. We always knew there was a chance of getting pregnant on it and we figured it that was God's plan then fine. Lucky for me I did not get really sick on it like alot of people and could tolerate the extra moodiness, breakouts, and low sex drive in order to not get pregnant.

WELL....Obviously God had other plans and I am SO thankful for that.

It all started in October 2008 when I felt like the Holy Spirit was asking me about the areas of my life that I don't trust fully to God. I felt like He distinctly said, "You want to trust me in all areas of your life, why not your fertility and having kids?"

I was like "whoa...I'd never thought of it that way" Thus began my spiritual journey to discover what God said about having kids, the purpose od kids, and also preventing it. I also learned some startling things about the birth control pill from Randy Alcorn that I was not comfortable with at all.

I knew with all this information I found and the things God was teaching me I needed to talk to Ben about it. To tell you the truth I was SCARED TO DEATH to tell him. So I prayed, gathered my well organized notes and was prepared for the battle that lay ahead.

He didn't take it well at first. He thought it was a ploy for me to try and get pregnant...which it of course was not.

I told him what God had taught me about trusting Him in every area of my life including this. And also that I believed God wouldn't give us something we couldn't handle.

I asked Ben to join with me in prayer for a week about it and then we would decide.

I know God did a great work in his heart because after just a few days and some more conversations he agreed to let me stop taking the birth control pill and use the Fertility Awareness method.

This method is a combo of taking your temperature, cervical position, and cervical mucous. It's used especially for people TTC. But others use it to prevent as well. And even though we were trying to trust, not prevent, we felt it was okay to know when my cycles were and obstain or use protection during that time.

So I bought myself a basal thermometor and off we went.

It takes time getting used to all this temping and such, but the nice thing is you know exactly when you ovulate based on a temperature shift. I figured that coming off the pill I might not ovulate for a few months...

Well, my regular cycles before the pill went right back after the pill. I ovulated the first month off the pill. I couldn't believe it! Then I started freaking out...We had a little slip up a few days before that and if sperm stay alive up to 5 days...uh oh...I could get pregnant!

So a week went by and I eventually calmed down but never forgot about it.

I left with Ben's mom to a conference in Dallas fully prepared to get my period while I was there. I had light cramps but nothing came. The first day of the conference I got really dizzy and had to sit down but nothing more than that. I decided to tell my MIL that I hadn't gotten my period yet and also about our decision to stop the pill and all that God was teaching me.

At first I was scared because I wasn't sure if she would support it or think we were crazy since Ben was about to start grad school. She took it well and I completely supportive. She said she had a feeling about it and thought I might be pregnant! I told Ben about it and he said, "Oh you're not...you always skipped your period while on the pill..." I tried to explain to him that you HAVE to start your period after you ovulate but he didn't get it. He did tell me he wanted to be the first one to know if I was pregnant so that meant waiting till I got home to take a test.

So I decided to take the test when I got home which also happened to be my 24th birthday. Ben even went to the store and bought the test for me. It was positive...it took awhile to sink in but we were both so happy and our families were too.

So it's just so amazing to think how God had it all planned out. I am getting closer to my lifelong dream of being a mom and it is happening even sooner than I was expecting!

Thankgiving and Such

Well we just got back yesterday from Thanksgiving at DH's uncle's house in Montana. A 15 HOUR DRIVE!! I felt pretty good up until the day after Thanksgiving. Yay for eating lots on Thanksgiving though. Friday I woke up pretty nauseous and exhausted. It was great though cause I laid about on the couch all day and knitted and slept. i was able to stand long enough to try my hand at shooting a pistol for the very first time...This is Montana remember? But after that I was ready for another nap. The ride home was LONG. We did it in two days rather than one like originally planned...thank goodness. I find I am so uncomfortable right now sitting for long periods of time and sleeping that it was torture. And the common Pregnancy Constipation is starting now too and that's no fun at all.

We did tell DH's family and it was so much fun. Everyone went around the table saying what they are thankful for and Dh's brother came right before us. He didn't know that everyone didn't know so he said, "I'm thankful that I'm going to be an uncle". It was the cutest thing...and a great lead in to our thanks...Everyone was so excited. Especially Dh's OMI. We told her that she was going to be a great-grandma for the 2nd time but she didn't quite get it so I said..."We're pregnant, we're going to have a baby!" Then she got it and was so happy. everyone started teasing my MIL and calling her "Grannie" and it was great! She's really excited too.

The last group of people to tell are my extended family. Since we weren't with them on Thanksgiving I wanted to wait and tell them in person at our get together on the 21st. I'm excited for that. I will be 9 weeks by then! That's just crazy!

Oh and I have one of my bridesmaids and her husband and DS coming over for dinner tonight (they live out of town) so I can't wait to tell them!